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Saturday, January 31, 2009

"Ooh, you're going straight to hell for THAT one!"

About 18 months ago, Joseph and I were having a conversation about Christmas and somehow it turned into a discussion about dying (I’m still not quite sure how).

You can read about that little chat here.

I remember feeling sad that he would worry about that sort of thing at his age. I mean, he was still only 4 years old at that time.

This morning, with my eyes barely open from sleeping, I find myself having another “grown up” talk with him firing questions at me on a topic that I would not have thought he was concerned about at the moment.

"Why do some Mummys and Daddys not live together anymore?"

My eyes miraculously opened quite quickly and M and I gave each other a look.

"Who told you that?" I asked, pretending not to really care. The standard answer of "nobody", came back. Of course, it came back with a smile as Joseph has sussed when he has touched a nerve and has our full attention. The questioning continued.

"When Mummys and Daddys don’t live together anymore, does one child live with the Daddy and another child live with the Mummy?" (his exact words).

He’s not daft of course; you have to be honest.

"Um, no. As far as I understand, the children usually stay together and live with the Mummy or the Daddy". I then went on to explain that it was true that some parents didn’t want to live together anymore. I also explained that he was lucky.


"Because your Mum and Dad love each other so much, that we are all gonna stay together forever".

M and I sat staring at him, his thumb being sucked on furiously, his eyes staring into space, processing the information I had given him. Although we got a smile out of him and he ran off down the landing to play in his room, the wind was pretty much knocked out of our sails.

Again, we thought it was sad that our six-year-old son seemed concerned about things that aren’t even on his (or our) horizon. Playground talk perhaps? Maybe one of his peers is going through a tough time. Or maybe one of the more spiteful little buggers in his class is winding him up?

Either way, just another lesson in life I guess.


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